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Standing Guard Over an Open Heart
by Debbie Porter (Debbie's bio)
[Note: If you'd like to read more from Debbie, be sure to subscribe to Breath of Fresh Air - Inspirations.]
We know to stay well clear.
For going close will only bring
A load of pain and tears.
But what about those other things
We don't see at the start;
Those little bits and pieces that
Invade our mind and heart?
They sneak in undercover
All disguised as “having fun”,
Then leave a scar upon our soul
When “playtime” is all done.
Now everyone is diff'rent,
What hurts me may not hurt you.
So we must use God's wisdom for
Our hearts to stay “true blue*”.
~ Debbie Porter ~
(* true blue - genuine and thorough; not modified, nor mixed; not spurious; uncompromising)
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It was a very typical school day morning.
The worst part of my day (the groggy 5.45 am stumble into the shower, followed by the totally unenviable task of dragging two reluctant teenagers from their cosy beds) was well over. Lunches were packed, beds were made, and Kylie and Matthew were making steady progress toward their eventual departure at 8.00 am.
As they busied themselves with the “hard work” of waking up, eating breakfast and making themselves presentable for the day, I switched on the television and prepared for my daily ironing marathon.
To be honest, I really don't mind ironing all that much. Although it does occasionally leave me with aching legs from standing so long, for the most part I consider it to be one of the more “entertaining” aspects of housework.
You see, there's no other household job that I can think of which gives me the “freedom” to watch television. Very difficult to do that when you're cleaning the shower or vacuuming the carpet; but I've always considered the chore of ironing as a quite legitimate excuse to take a bit of a “break” in front of the telly.
Of course timing means everything. Before deciding when to do the ironing, you must consult the TV Guide to make sure that you aren't wasting the viewing opportunity on some mind numbing documentary about the mating rituals of Siberian Aardvarks, when you could wait an hour or so and watch a wonderful classic movie or take a fascinating step back in time via the History Channel.
On this particular morning, I can't actually remember what I'd chosen to watch, but I do know that it had absolutely nothing to do with Aardvarks in any shape or form. I also know that it was actually quite interesting, and yet not so engrossing that I couldn't leave the ironing board to hang clothes away or to “encourage” Kylie and Matt to move themselves a little faster.
As I began pressing the family's freshly washed clothes, a promotion came on for one of the Movie Channels, with news about upcoming Sunday night premieres. While the announcer sang the praises of each new movie “treat”, I continued on with my work, half-heartedly listening for anything that might sound interesting.
The first film was one that definitely didn't appeal to me in the slightest.
“Pass!” I muttered, to no one in particular.
The second movie previewed also wasn't my cup of tea.
“Nope!” Once again I made my disinterested comment to the empty room.
Then came the third and final announcement of upcoming attractions, and instantly my lukewarm interest was fanned into a violent and unrestrained flame of vehement denial.
“NO! NO! NEVER, NEVER, EVER AGAIN! NO WAY! NEVER!”
I've got to admit that I was just a little surprised at how strong my reaction was to the news of this third movie release. Just the mention of its title alone had caused a wave of emotion to rise up within me as I remembered that night last April when I first saw it.
At this point you may be wondering what movie could possibly have caused me to react in such a way, even ten months later. It would be quite understandable if you thought that it must have been a film of great horror or violence. Understandable, but in this case not correct.
In fact, it wasn't particularly violent, and it definitely wasn't a horror story. Instead, the storyline was just incredibly emotive and managed to invade my soul, leaving me distressed and disturbed more than I had ever experienced before - at least in response to a fictional piece of work.
The movie was Steven Spielberg's “A I – Artificial Intelligence”, and the combination of an incredibly adorable little boy; a precious, but wise, talking teddy; and a tale of unrequited love, was just too much for this mother's heart to bear.
To be completely fair I have to say that it wasn't the movie alone that left me a blubbering mess ten months ago. There were contributing factors, such as illness and a particularly stressful period in what was our home church at that time. Top that off with the fact that we'd just driven 12 long hours that day to spend a week with my Dad and family in Queensland, and you have the perfect mixture for the overwhelming emotional response I had to Mr. Spielberg's movie.
So powerfully did this movie impact my emotions, that for the next few days someone only had to teasingly say, “Mummy, please don't leave me”, (a line that immediately brought back memories of one of the most upsetting parts of the movie) and the tears would come flooding to the surface.
It really is no wonder that Solomon included the following Wisdom in his book of Proverbs:
“Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”
~ Proverbs 4:23 NIV ~
There's no doubt that many people will have seen this particular movie and had no adverse reaction to it whatsoever. For some it was probably viewed as nothing more than a good dose of fantasy, while at the other end of the spectrum, some may have thought it was just a huge waste of time and video. The reality is that each of us is a unique creation and our way of assimilating information and events will also be quite different. That, in a nutshell, is why it's so hard to protect ourselves from every single influence that may be potentially unhealthy.
The obvious things are easy. As Christian men and women we know that there are some absolute taboos that must be avoided at all cost. First and foremost, we do this because we want to do right in God's eyes, but we also do this because we're all too aware of the damage that such things will do to our spiritual and emotional life.
Unfortunately, not everything is so cut and dried. So, that being the case, how do we manage to “guard our hearts” and keep that wellspring of life from becoming contaminated?
My personal opinion on this is that, basically, it comes down to keeping God's river of living water flowing into the well of our hearts at all times. You see that movie probably would have always had an unpleasant impact on my life, but its impact was magnified intensely because of the circumstances I was experiencing at that particular time. In the midst of illness, stress and exhaustion, I had definitely taken my focus off the One from Whom all blessings flow, and instead, had allowed the events and pressures of life to dictate to my emotions.
Mr. Spielberg's movie was just the straw that broke the camel's back. Or the tiny crack that caused the already crumbling dam to break.
As Christians, we all have to keep our hearts soft and open to both God and those He brings across our path. But we have to balance this with the need to protect our hearts from the multitude of unhealthy influences that bombard us on a daily basis. It can be a challenge to choose wisely, and the reality is that sometimes we will make mistakes in judgment.
Thankfully, the blessed truth is that when we do accidentally allow access to something that's potentially polluting, we don't have to let our hearts remain troubled or allow our emotions to run rampant. Instead, we just need to lift up our eyes to the Lord, surrender everything into His care, and let His living water, once again, pour healing, refreshment and peace right through to the very depths of our soul.
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"I call on the LORD in my distress,and he answers me."
~ Psalm 120:1 NIV ~
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Copyright 2003, Debbie Porter. All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.
| About Debbie Porter: Debbie is a 40 year old Mother to 2 teenagers, and wife to Steve for 18 years. They live in Sydney, Australia, and have a Garden Maintenance business. Deb's heart is to encourage and build up Christian Women to become everything God has created them to be, to believe in their potential and destiny and to minister God's love and grace into their lives through word and song. She has been called a breath of fresh air, and uses this as the name for the Ministry in which God is using her. |
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